THE PRESSURE TO BE PERFECT

THE PRESSURE TO BE PERFECT

This is my first blog I've written on my phone so apologies if there are any mistakes, the mobile app is very basic....
I'm currently detoxing in France for a while and have no WiFi so this will randomly get posted when I walk by some free WiFi hehe

Anyway, onto todays topic which is the intense need for perfection society presents us with.

It's everywhere - social media, school, TV. You strive for a perfect body, face, clothes, skin, hair, brains, manners and for what?

Nobody's monitoring you or judging you on these things that we are led to believe are important. Nobody will notice if your skin is slightly worse this week, but we are so conscious of these social standards and flood our screens with perfect people- we often feel like we are underachieving (well I do anyway.)

School is like this weird bubble where everyone really cares about what eachother is doing, which I found so toxic. News and gossip travels so fast in school and it's so easy to forget the important things like learning and being nice to others. I was more concerned with maintaining a perfect face of makeup and making my uniform look cool, until sixth form when I literally when the other way. I remember I used to go to the toilet every breaktime, backcomb my hair and add another layer of mascara to my half asleep eyes, then prance around the canteen for the last 2 minutes of break gossiping.

Looking back I want to rip my 20inch hair out and tell myself to fucking read a book or do something proactive instead of  trying to look pretty and bitch about those who weren't. I must add that I also looked so ridiculous and to even think I looked good is unearthing (this is year 9 primarily).

Within school perfection was a high bar to meet. You were either sporty or brainy. I was neither, I wasn't terrible at sport and I was never stupid... but being put into sets based on what teachers thought of you always felt a bit demoralising.
Once I got over not being in sports teams or top sets I strived to be the best I could be at MY level. I think in the long term this helped me as the people in top sets had so much extra pressure because they were used by the school for leader boards and results.
The problem with being perfect is that you have nowhere to go but down... when kids in those sets were struggling they were just disregarded and moved down a level; demoralising and unhelpful.... 

I found that in my lower sets there was less pressure and I could excel. Everyone has their strong suit but within my schools selection of subjects and activities I never really found mine. Since leaving school not much has changed, I guess I've just tried to lessen the pressure  I put on myself in life to be as good as everyone else, it's OK to not be the best at everything!??
ALSO, at school the pressure to go to Russell Group universities was immense. It was like you were a failure if you weren't going to uni, but it's really not for everyone so don't let pressures drive your life and decisions. I felt so embarrassed that I wasn't going to a Russell Group and now I am so so happy with my course and uni (everything happens for a reason, soz not soz). If I had gone to Uni of Leeds I would've been so out me depth and probs dropped out by now!!! Repeating my point that you can lower your personal bar that you've set yourself and still achieve great things!!!

In terms of social media and appearances, I think this is where we all feel the pressure.

I talk about this loads but without even noticing it, you are increasing the pressure for perfection that you put on yourself.

MOST PEOPLE DONT LOOK LIKE BELLA HADID AND KENDALL.

If you look at the UK on average, no offence but we aren't the most beautiful nation. DON'T COMPARE YOURSELF TO THIS TINY MINORITY ON INSTAGRAM. I literally don't know a single person who has a figure anything like a Kardashian or Em Rata, like it's such a minority...

In life, consider the important things. Friendships, love, family, learning etc - these things should be prioritised over these superficial things social media promote and society encourages. I'm aware I sound like such a dad but I am bored of it and have spent way too much of my life buying into these superficial fads which I thought would increase my happiness.
Realistically, I'm most happy when I'm with my gals or at festivals etc, not when my I'm doing the best at uni or my skins clear?

I'm constantly looking at ads for various products on insta, always the same stuff like teeth whitening, lip plumpers, skincare that are huge ££££££.... thinking I need it all to keep up with everyone else. Not to say stay in your lane but stay in your lane and do you the best you can (ignore society n celebs.)

It's the same with clothes. There's soooo much pressure to have the coolest BRANDED shit .. and half the time it looks bait. The best dressed ppl I know don't cover themselves in labels and just have their own style, which I LOVE. Obvs some designery stuff is nice but don't ever feel like you can't be fashionable if you don't wear or have any branded clothes. 

I don't know what my point is really, I guess I just want everyone to chill and expect less of eachother (superficially) and think more about things that really matter. Since having some time away and spending less time on social media I've found myself reading and writing a lot which has made me so much more relaxed and happy. I've even started to write a diary (which is a massive who) like who even does that anymore lol x me x 

At the end of the day people will love you for your personality- not for your grades, qualifications or attractiveness.

Soz it's not very well worded but I'm hot and flustered in France without my thesaurus so it's a casual one today lol x